Hello Ben,
I am sorry about this delay in responding.
And regarding your query, it is not possible to change the back color of the cell(header/row) to highlight it while the grid control's GridVisualStyles property is set. Since while the GridVisualStyles is set, the appearance of the cell( header cell, button type cell etc., ) will get overridden and cannot be changed.
Please let me know if you have any questions.
Best Regards,
Meera.
Syncfusion, Inc.
http://www.syncfusion.com/