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When using the grid with a "virtual model", how do you get the grid to recognize that the column and row counts have changed ? I have overridden the QueryColCount and QueryRowCount event handlers, but what is it that forces the underlying events to fire ?

Normally, when there is new data to display, you just redraw the grid by calling Refresh() or RefreshRange() or Invalidate. This forces the grid to request the new data when it draws. So, if your external data changes column 2, then you can call gridControl1.Refresh(GridRangeInfo.Col(2)); to have the grid redraw column 2 using the new data. If you do something like change the number of rows and columns, you may also have to call ResetVolatileData(); as these values may get cached.